Run Out of Road
by Fellowshipper
Summary: Life on the road is hard enough, especially when you're broke, hungry, and secretly in love with your clueless best friend. (Jay/Adam slash)
1. Default Chapter

Title: Run Out of Road

Rating: PG-13 for language and slashy stuff. 

Notes: This is just a little side-piece I did while once again trying to work through writer's block. Blah. It's real-person fic, so if that bugs you, you might wanna turn back now. It was also semi-inspired by "Boys Say Go" by the insanely talented Nix, which you can also find on ff.net and are muchly encouraged to go read. Now. Oh yeah - and there's some slash stuff in here, too. Nothing graphic, but if that bothers you, run away while you can. 

******

"I feel like a whore." 

The comment came totally unexpectedly, so much so that Jason Reso, notorious for his oblivious attitude, was knocked from his silent reverie. For the past several minutes, he'd entertained himself by counting the telephone poles as they whipped by. Suddenly reminded that there was in fact someone else in the car with him, he shifted just enough to better see his best friend and partner in crime, Adam Copeland. 

"Why's that?" 

Adam refrained from answering at first, opting instead to drum his fingers along the steering wheel in a manner that was clearly evident he was trying to keep from hitting something. His brow was furrowed slightly and the car was slowly but steadily increasing in speed, both of which made Jay quite uneasy. 

"Because it's like I'm selling myself one piece at a time." 

So that was what it was all about. Being that they had been literally living out of Jay's ancient but trusty Chevy for the past several weeks, sometimes sacrifices had to be made. Personal belongings were constantly having to be sold or bartered for simple necessities. Since both of them were stubborn by nature and wanted desperately to prove their independence, they wouldn't even consider help from their parents, even despite Adam's mother's eagerness to send what money she could. The result often meant empty stomachs and sore bodies due to sleeping in impossible positions in the car. Laundromats were out of the question, usually forcing them to wash their clothes in the bathrooms of the arenas. 

And, most recently, they had been forced to sell half their CD collection to pay for gas. Adam was, to put it lightly, not taking the situation easily. 

"Y'know, we could prob'ly make more money if we really *were* whores," he went on, taking an exit off the highway and pulling into a stop-and-go gas station. In an attempt to calm him a little, Jay pulled out his wallet, half expecting to see moths flying out of it. Instead, he found a picture of his girlfriend - ex as of last week - and seven dollars plus some loose change. That would be just enough for three or four gallons of gas and maybe a small bag of chips. 

The hobo life was sorely overrated. 

He left Adam to the task of pumping gas while he headed inside. Three minutes later he emerged, only to see his friend across the street at a payphone, undoubtedly talking to his mom. As he always did, he would keep the truth from her and put in its place stories of how he and Jay would be going out to see the town that night and other things normal people did while in their early twenties. Never mind the fact Adam more than likely had absolutely no idea what town they were even in. 

Jay frowned and took a loud sip from the cherry Slurpie he'd given in to buying. He could admire Adam's determination, but sometimes he wondered if maybe it didn't hurt him just as much as it helped. Adam would no doubt leave out the fact that he seemed to be developing a chronic back condition because of their cramped sleeping conditions, nor would he mention that he'd given up lunch money to pay for the long distance phone call home. 

Another couple minutes passed before Adam came back to the car, obviously still upset but in a somewhat better mood. Jay offered a sip of his Slurpie but Adam waved it away. 

"What'd Mom have to say?" Jay asked for conversation's sake. It no longer even seemed remotely weird for him to say such a thing, since he had been an unofficial member of the family since he was ten. 

"Nothing much, just wanted to know how we were, if we needed money, if we were dads yet . . . y'know. The norm." 

Jay grinned to himself behind the cup. He only wished that had been option. Between sleeping and picking out personal belongings that could be hocked for a meal, there wasn't much by way of physical recreation. Of course, that might very well change since all of Jay's faithfulness had been for naught. There had been one or two odd instances when Adam gave into a willing and pretty girl at a bar, but given his penchant for choosing sleep over sex, those times were rarities. 

Not having anything better to do, Jay went back to counting the passing telephone poles. Try as he might to keep his thoughts from going back to Rachel, they went anyway. A few days earlier while sorting through the stack of mail his mother forwarded to him, he came across a letter from Rachel claiming she couldn't handle his schedule. She failed to tell him that she was already seeing someone else. 

Schedule. Right. Jay snorted into the Slurpie. She didn't know what it was like to go days on end without eating or sleeping, or seeing your childhood dream die a little every time you had to turn the backseat into a bed. Oh well. She'd be sorry when he made it to the big time. 

That was, of course, assuming Adam's driving didn't kill him first. 

  
  


******

"I'm homesick." 

"Me, too." 

"Wanna go home?" 

"Nah."

"'kay." 

Such was the way most post-match conversations went. 

Jay and Adam both sat on the hood of the Chevy passing a half-empty beer bottle back and forth, as one was as much as they could afford at the moment. Their match finished, the show ended, and the crowd gone, they decided to unwind in the easiest and cheapest way possible. So, as was common between them, they split a beer and talked about anything that happened to come to mind. As it turned out, Jay was just letting it sink in that he'd actually been dumped, and Adam was babbling about wanting to go back home and sleep. They both knew neither was really listening to the other, but it was still comforting to have an ear to unload on. 

"Hey, look," Adam started, pointing up directly overhead. "The big dipper." 

Jay laughed softly and snatched the bottle away. "There's no such thing, man." 

"Yeah huh! It's right there!" 

Jay shook his head. "Nope, sorry. The big dipper isn't a constellation." 

"Then what is it, O Genius of the Stars?" 

"An asterism." He glanced casually to his left to see Adam staring blankly at him. "A group of stars that don't really make anything." 

Adam frowned while taking the bottle back to finish it off. "So . . . you mean the big dipper isn't really anything at all?" 

"Yup. Well, it's part of Ursa Major, if it makes you feel better." 

"Which is . . ." 

"The great bear." 

Adam tilted his head back and squinted. "I don't see it." 

"It doesn't really look like a bear, so don't feel too bad." 

Adam shook his head in amusement. "You're the only guy I know who randomly bursts into conversations about stars." 

Jay grinned and folded his hands over his stomach. "You think that's cool, you should hear me burp the alphabet." 

"What is it with you and stars anyway? I mean, they're just . . .stars. Is there really any real life benefit to minoring in astronomy?" 

"Not unless you plan on being a teacher, no. It just interests me - even if you *did* break my telescope." 

Adam flushed a dull crimson. "It was an accident! And that was ten years ago! Get over it already." 

"Accident my ass. You powerbombed me on top of it." 

"Oh yeah, that's it. I'm on a quest to destroy your pseudo-career as an astronomer. Right." 

"The rest of the world's out to get me, so why not?" He winced, realizing instantly that his bitterness had seeped through much stronger than he'd intended, but thankfully Adam kept quiet on the matter. To change the subject slightly, Jay went on. "Theoretically, we can see into the past." 

"Oh, God, here we go with the psychic friends network." 

"No, seriously. The stars you're seeing right now are how they looked years and years ago." 

Adam's brow furrowed in thought. "So you think time travel's possible?" 

Jay fell silent for a moment, then shrugged. "To an extent, yeah. If you mean something like out of an H. G. Wells book, no. But I do think you can find out things about the past just in the sky." 

"You're a freak." 

"But that's why you love me, right?" 

Adam laughed, but was not given a chance to shoot off a sarcastic response before Jay slid off the hood and then began rummaging through the backseat. When he climbed back up into his spot, he held a pair of binoculars. 

"Oh, God, you're such a dork," Adam laughed, rolling his eyes for emphasis. His only indiction he was heard at all was Jay flipping him off. 

"It's a great night, just kinda cloudy but still really clear," Jay mumbled to himself. "Here. I wanna show you something." 

"Unless it's E.T., I don't care." 

"Wanna see another galaxy?" 

Adam turned skeptical eyes to his friend. "Huh?" 

Jay handed the binoculars over. "You could see it better if I still had my telescope," he ribbed, faking a sniffle, "but it's clear enough for these to work." 

"Uh huh." 

"Fine the north star." When Adam didn't move, Jay coughed. "Last one in the little dipper's handle." 

"Help the dumb blond out here, wouldja?" 

Jay sighed and placed a hand over Adam's, choking down the various emotions the touch brought to mind long enough to guide his line of vision. "There. Now go a little diagonal and up. See that really bright thing?" 

". . . yeah." 

"That's Andromeda." 

"Really?" 

"Yeah. Astronomy's one of the few classes I actually paid attention in." 

After a while, Adam lowered the binoculars and rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Jay?" 

"Hmm?" 

"With all this stuff everywhere and so much else out there . . . well . . . do you think it's logical for there to be a God?" 

"No," Jay replied without hesitation, "but I think there is one." 

"Why?" 

"Why not?" 

Adam huffed and blew a long strand of hair from his eyes. "I asked you first." 

"Fine. I was raised that way. Besides . . . it helps me sleep at night thinking I'm not just gonna be worm food when I die." 

"I could have you cremated if you want. Use you as cat litter or something." All Adam received in return was a heated glare. "But that's a new one, y'know . . . a religious astronomer. Isn't that some kind of oxymoron or something?" 

"I'm just full of surprises," Jay admitted dryly, never taking his eyes from the sky for fear he might reveal some of those surprises. The mysteries of the universe were easier for him to grasp and understand than his own complexities. 

"You know," Adam started to break the silence, "I am absolutely crushed. I never knew the big dipper wasn't a real constellation." 

"Hate to sound too harsh, but there's no Santa Clause, either." 

"Prick." 

Jay allowed himself a private little smile; he knew there was a reason he loved Adam. 


	2. 2

"Two months, Jason. Two freaking long months and we've yet to sleep in a real bed." 

"I know, man, but -" 

"We're rotting away!" 

Jay, for the most part, was at a loss as to what could possibly be done. Adam was currently spending every last penny he had getting himself drunk and angering quite a few bar patrons. The owner hovered ominously nearby, watching suspiciously as Jay tried to pry Adam off a stool. 

"Motel 6 wouldn't even take us as poor as we are!" Adam continued, slamming down an empty glass and staring up at his friend, swaying a bit back and forth. "Look at them, Jay," he demanded with a vague gesture meant to indicate everyone else in the bar. "They all have normal lives! Jobs! They aren't living out of a car and on a box of Tic-Tacs a day, chasing after some dream that'll never happen!" 

"I know, Adam, but we're gonna have to leave before -" 

"Dammit, I wanna be like them!" Adam cried angrily, a hint of misery creeping into his voice. "I wanna be able to go to a bar, get drunk, and throw up in my *own* toilet, not alongside the road somewhere in some town I've never heard of! I - I wanna pick a girl up in a club and have sex in my own bed!" 

Tired of reasoning and wary of the menacing bar owner, Jay grabbed Adam's elbow and dragged him out the door. As he found out, getting to the parking lot was the easy part. 

"No." 

"No what?" 

"I'm not going. I'm not gonna live in that car anymore. I'll just walk." 

Jay let out a heavy, suffering sigh. "Adam, you're drunk. I mean, if you really wanna try to walk back to Toronto, be my guest."

Adam only broke Jay's grip and flashed angry green eyes back at him before walking out from under the protection of the awning and into the pouring, icy October rain. "All this time we've been selling ourselves and everything we own, and for what, Jason? Where has it gotten us? My birthday's tomorrow, Jay. I'll be twenty-five and celebrating it eating a pack of M&Ms in a goddamned beat up Chevy that's older than I am! What the hell kind of life is this?" 

Jay followed out into the rain, shocked momentarily by how very cold it was. He was shocked more still when Adam turned to face him and showed how gaunt he was starting to look and how desperate his eyes really were. For a brief second, Jay wanted to hold him until the pain left, but he knew Adam certainly didn't need any more weight on his shoulders. 

"Listen to me. If you honestly think I listened to you talk about being a wrestler my whole life, skipped our college graduation party to help you pack for a cross-country tour, left my home and girlfriend -- who dumped me last week because of it, just so you know --and everyone I knew behind to go all across the entire North American continent so that you could, months later, get drunk, breakdown, and wuss out on me, you are absolutely fucking insane! You are *not* going to bail out on me now, Adam, and I'll be damned if I just let you pack up and run home to Mommy because things are rough. No, I don't like it any more than you do, but you were the one who made me think we could handle this in the first place. You're stronger than this. We both are. I'm not gonna let you quit on me. We've come too far." 

Adam blinked. 

Jay took a deep breath and ran a hand through his soaking wet hair. "Good. Now get your ass in the car. It's freezing out here." 

He did.

Jay slid into the driver's side, risking their already faulty car battery by leaving ti on so the heater could unthaw their hands and noses. Adam all but molded himself to the door, trying to gather what little heat he could from his soaked leather jacket. 

"I can't take this shit much more," he moaned through chattering teeth. Anger subsiding, Jay felt a sharp sympathy pang and reached over to pull the hair from his friend's face, wet and plastered to the skin, and then ran comforting circles along his back. 

"Someday it'll all be worth it, Adam, I promise. I don't know when, but trust me." 

It was hard for him to be the supportive one, knowing Adam had up to that point been the proverbial glue that held them together. He should have known the pressure would eventually break him, but Jay had always put Adam on a pedestal, seeing him as someone who saw good in everything and always stayed determined. To see him come so far only to now fall apart and sobbing quietly with his arms wrapped around himself was something like a slap in the face. It was all Jay could do not to break down crying too, though for reasons Adam would likely and hopefully never know. 

Instead, Jay crawled a little closer and pulled Adam against him, letting him turn and bury his head on his shoulder. Jay tried to ignore how bony the shoulders were that trembled violently in his arms, or the too-sharp bone of the chin that jutted against his collar bone. That would only force the tears to come, and for Adam's sake, he had to be the strong one this time. Rather, he poked his nose into the mass of wet hair at his shoulder and whispered soft, consoling words. 

Only when Adam's trembling eased and he fell asleep did Jay finally allow his own tears to fall. 

******

The first thing Jay was aware of upon waking was the sound of light rain tapping against the car. The second thing was the foreign sensation of warmth coming from someone nearby. 

He looked down, surprised to see Adam resting against him, arms locked securely around his waist as if afraid Jay would leave him while he slept. His long legs were tucked underneath him in a manner that made Jay hurt to look at. Long, just slightly damp blond hair tumbled over Jay's shoulder, tempting him to reach out and run his fingers through it. What got to him most, however, was the way Adam's head was tilted up, lips barely parted and so close to his Jay's own. He could sneak a kiss right now and Adam would never be the wiser . . .

Jay pushed the thought to the back of his mind. If he'd learned nothing else by rooming with him in college, it was that Adam was almost as straight as the Pope himself. It was for that reason Jay never mentioned his oft-times swinging tendencies or how he'd been well aware of them for the past few years. 

Looking down at his best friend and hopeless crush, Jay came to the only logical conclusion that could be reached: God was a woman and She was out to make him pay for all the times he'd fallen asleep in church as a child. 

He cursed himself inwardly for the utterly wrong thoughts that kept coming up unbidden in his mind. There were other guys in the world, surely - so why did he have to choose this one - this so very *straight* one - to develop such an unhealthy obsession with? Adam was his friend and would never be anything more. Maybe if he told himself that long enough and forcefully enough, he'd believe it. 

There were still times, though, when he wondered if maybe the feelings were reciprocal. Of course, he could very well attribute that to his over-active imagination reading too much into a look, word, or touch. Even if by some act of God, Satan, or the IRS Adam would ever go after a guy, he certainly wouldn't go for such a scrawny runt of a man. 

But damn it all, did he ever look like an angel. 

Jay sighed quietly, taking advantage of the moment to admire Adam in all his angelic innocense. A few strays of golden hair fell into his face, a striking effect once coupled with the enviously long eyelashes that hovered just above high, pronounced cheekbones. Full lips were turned up into a perfectly natural pout as if taunting Jay with the promise of a kiss he would never taste. 

He could already see his epitaph: "here lies Jason Reso, the world's own greatest masochist." As the thought was too much for even him to handle, he carefully disentangled Adam's arms from his body and stepped outside the car into the early morning rain. He fumbled through the duffel bags in the back seat, making sure not to wake his friend in the process. After a great deal of struggling, he uncovered his binoculars, ran a loving hand across them, and closed the door. They were the last things he'd brought with him and hadn't sold besides his clothes. Casting another glance to Adam, he tugged his jacket up over his head to guard against the rain and started walking. 

******

There were three things in life Adam Copeland detested with every ounce of his being: rain, hangovers, and funeral homes. He could see through the spaces between the fingers cradling his throbbing head that it was raining. All he needed was to be dragged to a viewing and he could officially declare it a crappy day. 

He let out a low groan, wishing the hammering in his head would ease enough to let him form a coherent thought. Unfortunately, all he could manage to register in his mind was the scent of Jay's cologne wafting under his nose. As nice a thought as it was, he didn't need that kind of shock to his system when his stomach already felt like it was crawling up his throat. 

Looking down, he noticed Jay's light jacket tucked in around him. It was sweet almost to the point of being nauseating. Speaking of him . . . Adam looked around the car, a bit surprised to find that Jay was no where in sight. As if on cue, the driver's side door opened and Jay dove inside. As a matter of instinct, Adam whirled around quickly enough to send his vision spinning. 

"You scared the hell outta me, you bastard!" Once his breathing evened, he had to actively stifle the grin creeping across his face when he caught a good glimpse of his friend. Jay, for all intents and purposes, looked very much like a wet, shaggy sheep dog. His face was nearly obscured by the hair clinging to it. Water rolled from the ends down over his jacket and vanished. 

"Are you *trying* to catch pneumonia?" Adam asked with more anger than he really felt. Before Jay could reply, Adam reached over and pulled the soggy hair away, showing a tiny smile when he noticed a pair of wide hazel eyes staring back at him. "There you are. Should I call you Cousin It?" 

Jay choked down the feelings aroused when Adam tucked his hair behind his ear. There was nothing there. At all. Stop fantasizing. 

"Uh . . . Jay? Still there?" 

"Huh? Oh . . . yeah." Jay snapped out of his trance with no small amount of embarrassment, more than a little disappointed to find that Adam's hand was no longer against his cheek. "Sorry." 

If Adam had noticed the awkward pause, he chose not to comment on it. Instead, he opted to move to the next obvious question. "Isn't it a little cold and early to be out jogging?" 

Jay forced a smile and a shrug. "Yeah, but I wasn't jogging. I got your birthday present." 

Adam's brow narrowed suspiciously, remembering the last time Jay had gotten him a present without him knowing. It had been the first indication that there was something seriously wrong in Jay's mind, since a middle-aged man in a pink monkey suit showed up at their high school singing "Sixteen Candles." Adam had never really forgiven him for that yet; he was still trying to find proper retribution. "Do I even wanna know?" 

"You'll find out later. Trust me." 

"Prob'ly a meeting with a hitman or something." 

Jay arched his eyebrows. "You don't have much faith in me, do you?" 

"Sure I do!" Adam shot back, hand over heart. "If I had any more faith, you'd have to start your own religion just so I could worship you." 

Jay grimaced; that was definitely not the image he needed at that moment. "Yeah, you're right. It's a hitman." 


	3. 3 (The End)

Only I, Adam thought to himself, could have this kind of birthday party. 

He sat in the male dressing room, back against the lockers, watching with barely concealed laughter the events taking place in front of him. Jessica Miller, one of the few woman wrestlers in the federation, drew closer, pushing her breasts up all with a straight face. She poked her lips out into an exaggerated pout. 

"Happy birthday, Mr. Wrestler," she started in a breathy, husky voice. "Happy birthday Mr. Wrestler." By that point she had made it close enough to thread her fingers through his hair. "Happy birthday, Mr. Wrestler . . . happy birthday to you." Suddenly, a fellow wrestler placed a whirling fan on the floor directly beneath her, making her white dress billow up around her. 

Adam shook his head but applauded anyway. "Somehow, I don't remember Marilyn Monroe being that muscular." 

"Gah!" Jessica yelped when the huge brown cotton ball she'd taped to her cheek blew off and rolled across the floor. "Well, damn. I guess I'll be Madelyn Monroe now or something." 

"You're all freaking nuts." 

"Oh, lighten up, Adam. We had to celebrate. Just don't take it personally that I drew the line at jumping out of a cake." 

Adam offered a broad grin in return, tugging Jessica closer so he could plant a chaste kiss on her cheek. "Well, thanks anyway." 

"No problem, kiddo," she shrugged, knowing it frustrated him whenever she hinted at her six-year seniority status. "I gotta go, but have a great one. And gimme a call if you ever need entertainment for a bachelor's party." 

"Will you jump out of the cake?" 

Jessica paused in the doorway, a faint smirk parting her lips. "You introduce me to Benjamin Franklin and all his dead green friends and we'll talk." She winked and slung her bag over her shoulder. "Later, kid." 

The rest of the locker room offered their well wishes, some accompanied by a pat on the shoulder or a ruffling of hair, as they filed out the door. That left him and Jay - the evil brat whose twisted mind probably gave birth to this mess in the first place. 

Adam snuck from his spot on the bench to a side bathroom, peering inside to see Jay rifling through a duffel bag and mumbling to himself. Making sure he kept as quiet as he could, he made it undetected right behind his friend. Jay never had time to react before he found himself being put into a loose sleeper hold. 

"Alright, punk. This was your idea, wasn't it?" 

Jay closed his eyes, willing himself to just sink right through the floor. Try as he might to come up with a good answer, all he could focus on was how good the arms around his neck felt. Giving into a moment of weakness, he went slack enough to force Adam to support his weight unconsciously. Even through his heavy leather jacket Jay could feel slight muscles against his back. It was a far cry from the lanky, skinny kid he'd grown up with. The weakness spread, making him pick up the smell of soap and fresh cologne, with the barest scent of sweat underneath it all. It was an odd but intoxicating mixture so very much Adam it nearly made Jay want to break down sobbing. 

"It was Jessie's idea," he finally replied once his brain started functioning properly again. For a second, Jay foolishly let himself believe he would make it out of this alive. That was until he looked up and met the reflection in the mirror. Adam was . . . oh, ferchrissakes, he was *trying* to drive him insane. Having been assaulted by the birthday party crew from Hell almost as soon as he'd left the shower, he really hadn't been given a chance to dress properly. The result was him being shirtless and wearing a pair of faded blue jeans that had to be cutting off at least a third of his oxygen supply. Jay mused silently how many states outlawed jeans like that. 

Keep your eyes above the belt, Jay practically screamed at himself. I don't care if he *is* the second coming of Adonis, he is not a sex toy to be gawked senselessly at. Well, okay, he is, just don't do it and be so obvious about it. 

Thankfully, Adam let his friend go before Jay could spontaneously combust and become a pile of smouldering ashes on the ground. He wasn't quite finished yet, though, as he flashed that infuriatingly beautiful smile. "I'm gonna head on out to the car. Don't take all night, huh?" 

Unable to make his mouth form anything remotely intelligible, Jay settled for a simple nod. He watched through the mirror as Adam disappeared out the door. Much as he hated himself for it, the image of his backside and those tight jeans was indelibly branded into his mind. That tore it. Jay knew without a doubt that he was going to burn in Hell for all of this. He could take a bit of solace in the knowledge that at least he would have some pleasant memories to keep him company. 

A violent inner struggle was fought before he made himself go out of the arena to the parking lot. Adam sat on the hood, head tilted back and a grotesquely large sucker in his mouth. Jay swore sharply under his breath, deciding God and Satan were both bitter feminists whose only joy was to make him miserable. 

Suddenly aware of Jay's presence, Adam turned and smiled sheepishly. "Forgot you had the keys. But look - I found Andromeda. Pretty cool star stuff goin' on out here, Jay." He waggled his eyebrows in feigned excitement. "Better go get your binoculars!" 

"Anyone tell you lately what an insufferable asshole you are?" Jay groused as he tossed his bag into the back seat. "Sure, let's all mock astronomy-boy. Remind me to throw you into a black hole next time the opportunity presents itself." 

"You'd miss me," Adam teased, sliding off the hood and getting into the passenger seat. 

"Yeah," Jay offered without protest. It was enough to make Adam stop in bewilderment. 

"I . . . uh, wasn't expecting that," he admitted once they were out on the road. Jay shrugged carelessly.

"Sorry." 

So ended that particular conversation. 

Not knowing what else to say, Adam dug around in the glove compartment to find a folded map. The street lamps overhead provided a little light with which he could trace a tentative route. Jay never was one for maps to begin with, so the odds of him actually deciding on a certain path were already shot. Still, it gave Adam a chance to do something besides dwell too much on his friend's odd comments. 

"Next show's in Milwaukee, right?" 

"Yeah." 

"You should be able to get there faster if you take that on-ramp." 

"What on-ramp?" 

". . .the one you just passed." 

"Whoops." 

Adam sighed and tossed the map into the backseat. "So much for that idea." 

"Oh well. I've got other plans anyway." Jay glanced to his right and let out some sort of snort-laugh hybrid. "Get rid of that sucker. You look like a damned chipmunk." 

"Jeez! You shoot down my driving advice, you insult me . . . incase you hadn't noticed, this is supposed to be my birthday here!" 

Though driven to the breaking point and not being careful to watch himself, Jay still restrained himself from beating his head against the steering wheel. "Okay, fine. Would you rather I tell you you're gorgeous and I've got half the mind to pull over, hold you down, and have my way with you?" 

Adam blinked in surprise. "Er . . . y'know, I really wasn't expecting that one either." 

A stifling silence filled the car, giving Jay time to consider whether or not he should just plow the car headfirst into a tree. Had he really just said that? Why wasn't Adam saying anything? Oh, great. Life was coming to a crashing halt. 

"Uh . . . Jase? Care to let me know where we're going?" 

Was he trying to change the subject? Was he honestly curious? Jay bit his lip before a whimper could escape. At long last he pulled into a small motel, fished a pair of keys from his pocket, then tossed them to Adam. 

"What'm I supposed to do with these?" 

"See, you turn this one around put it in the door -" 

"Funny. What's this all about?" 

Jay didn't answer, only left the car and started walking to the motel room door. Adam, a few seconds afterwards, got the hint and followed suit. The door gave way under the key's manipulation and swung open to reveal an unspectacular motel room. Adam stepped cautiously inside, half-expecting someone to jump from the shadows and give him a heart attack. All he received for his paranoid thoughts was Jay turning the overhead light on. Dull light flooded the room, casting a yellow glow on the few items in the tiny area: a three-drawer dresser, a night stand with a telephone on top that probably didn't work, a lamp, and a relatively small bed. 

"Whoa." 

Adam turned when he heard the door close. Jay stood leaning against it, arms folded over his chest and a satisfied grin on his face. "Happy birthday." 

"You mean . . .how'd you pay for this?" 

Jay shrugged, sending his gaze to the ground; it couldn't be coincidence Adam had paired the air-impairing jeans with an equally tight black muscle shirt. "Same way we pay for everything - I sold some stuff." 

"What kinda stuff?" 

"Don't worry about it." 

Deciding to take the advice, Adam did a flying leap onto the bed. A look of pure ecstasy came over him, enough to make him give a gleeful squeal. "Oh, Christ. Jay, it's a real bed! C'mere, man, you gotta try this thing out!" 

Jay shook his head, walking to the side of the bed. "Nah. It's your birthday, remember?" 

"Only for about five more minutes," Adam pointed out with a nod to the desk clock. "But what'd you sell?" 

"Yo mama," Jay answered without missing a beat, rolling his eyes accordingly. 

"Oh, I *know* you didn't just dis my mama, yo." 

"So totally. Word." Jay paused, brow furrowing. "Heh. We should make a gimmick from that." 

"Yeah. That'd rule," Adam agreed. "But seriously - what'd you sell?" 

"You're not gonna leave me alone until I tell, are you?" 

"Nope." 

Jay sighed in exasperation. "Fine. Relentless little shit . .. My binoculars and a couple CDs." 

"Aw man, Jay, you really shouldn't've done that." 

"It's no big deal." 

"No, we could have used that money! Do you have any idea what a long drive it is from here to Milwaukee?" 

Jay's jaw fell slack, providing enough of a distraction for Adam to bridge the distance between them, grab Jay's shirt collar, and unceremoniously yank him into bed beside him. 

"What the hell -!" 

"It's not my birthday anymore," Adam explained with a broad grin. "And I was only kidding about the money thing. This is great and I love it, but you still shouldn't have spent all this on me." 

Jay, to his credit, never once gave into the tempting urge to look over at Adam's feline-like graceful body, all smooth muscle outlined in close detail. That was probably due to the fact he kept his eyes fixed on the ceiling overhead. Unfortunately, even the water spots seemed erotic and perverse to him. He could almost hear God laughing at him. 

"Eh, whatever. I figured it'd quit your whining about the car for a while and shut your mouth." He conveniently left out the fact he could easily think of several other ways to shut Adam's mouth. Since he refused to blurt that out, a somewhat tense silence followed, broken only when Adam yawned. 

"You know, I'm not making you take the floor. I'll split the bed with you." 

Oh, that's great, Jay thought. Adonis - completely *straight* Adonis - wants to sleep with me. 

"Ah, that's okay. I think this things's really only big enough for one of us." Unless we sleep one on top of the other, in which case I would melt right through the bed and leave a nasty stain on the floor. "And why are you staring at me?" 

"Just wondering how I got such a good friend." 

If he wasn't busy trying to focus on the light in a half-hearted attempt to blind himself, Jay would have laughed. He settled for a snort instead. "Oh, jeez. What Hallmark card did you rip that off of?" 

Adam grinned impishly. "That *was* pretty corny, wasn't it?" Not given a reply, he rolled onto his side, making Jay more than a little uncomfortable by staring. "Actually, I was wondering about what you said earlier." 

"I said lots of things." 

Adam's cheeks filled with a faintly rose color. "About you . . . uh, having your way with me." 

Jay groaned and cursed every deity that came to mind. So this was how the world ended: not with a bang or a whimper, but lying in a motel bed beside the best friend you had all but told you wanted to ravage. "It was a joke, Adam, I -" 

He might have apologized had he been given a chance to finish and Adam hadn't pulled him closer and pressed their mouths together. It was such a timid, innocent kiss it was almost laughable. The only problem with laughing was that Jay wasn't entirely sure there was even any air at all in his lungs. 

The kiss ended nearly as suddenly as it began, and Jay had to blink several times to gain his bearings. Now if only the damned inconsiderate walls would stop spinning . . .

He looked up to see Adam's green eyes widened to almost comical proportions, looking very much like the proverbial deer in headlights. He held his breath in tense anticipation of how Jay would react. In all honesty, he probably would have toyed with Adam for a while, but the truth then was that he was just as stunned and uncertain of what to do next. 

"I wasn't expecting that," he announced finally, mimicking Adam's earlier comments. 

"Look, I - I'm sorry if I shouldn't have-" 

"You should've," Jay interrupted, closing the gap between them and initiating a kiss of his own. He was amused when Adam made a tiny noise that should have come from a stunned animal. Encouraged by the reaction, he reached out to touch tongue to lips in search of an entrance. As if they no longer obeyed his brain, his hands moved up and over the shirt, making a note to get rid of it as soon as possible. Moments later they came to rest on either side of Adam's face, thumbs stroking the jawbones. They were much too prominent, even for Adam's naturally bony figure, evidence of the toll road life had taken on him when he gave up his own chances at meals so that Jay could eat. The poignant realization twisted something inside Jay; he parted Adam's lips, drawing the other man's own tongue into his mouth and suckling gently. The reward was something of an electric shock through Adam. The next thing Jay knew, he was on his back with Adam's dead weight pressing down on him. 

The kiss ended after what seemed a lifetime, and Jay forced his eyes open. He was greeted by a sweet, seductive smile he'd never seen, Adam's green eyes glimmering mischievously and his hair falling down on either side of his friend's head. 

In short, it was enough to make Jay grin deliriously in a way accomplished only by the insane and someone in love. 

Adam bent, pressing his nose against Jay's so that their mouths were just barely apart. "Now do you wanna split the bed?" 

Jay never verbally answered, only linked his arms around Adam's neck and pulled him closer. And, in the end, that was answer enough. 

  
  


It's leavin' time again.

I'm headed out with all my friends. 

It's a roll of the dice.

I've never thought twice about the way I've been spending my time,

Trying my guts out for every dime.

Working in an office building tall,

Don't know who's next to you at all.

But being out here,

The blood, the guts, the beer is a test

Only time will tell.

Brings you close, man,

Closer than Hell. 

  
  


We're leaving, we're leaving again.

Can't recall where all we've been. 

Guess we'll just go,

Go till we're too old

Or we run out of road. 

  
  


The other day I talked to Lou -

He quit back in '92.

Says he misses it bad...

Those were the best times we ever had. 

He said, "Give it Hell till the end

'Cause once you quit, you can't get it back again." 

  
  


We're leaving, we're leaving again.

Can't recall where all we've been. 

Guess we'll just go,

Go till we're too old

Or we run out of road. 

  
  


Expensive cabs and shitty food

Washed down with canceled flights,

Missed wake-up calls,

Missed holidays . . .

You miss your boy and wife.

All the late night drives that cause the dawn to strike you like a knife...

Hey man, this is a beautiful life. 

  
  


We're leaving, we're leaving again.

Can't recall where all we've been. 

Guess we'll just go,

Go till we're too old

Or we run out of road. 

- "Till We Run Out of Road," Jewel


End file.
